Letters To the One Who Holds the Sea

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You are the first time

I’ve ever been afraid to love.

I’m in the shoes of old lovers,

embarking on the most brilliant test of empathy

unable to navigate these uncharted waters

yet, containing enough tension...

that I turn the sand on your beach into mirrors, 

to reflect the love I cannot give you. 

For, you are so expansive

I can’t help but be intrigued. 

Even if for a moment…

as I toy with the idea that this won’t be my death.

Before that curiosity shows its ugly face as fear

And promptly kills the cat. 

water

Like water you fall deep-

hard.

Crashing like a wave,

over and over,

as you flow and edge and ebb

without boundaries-

because you find solace in your abundance.

You overflow in love,

filing their cup and yours twice over

as that is the only way you know how to connect. 

But sweet spirit, 

I’m scared I’ll drown under the weight of your soul 

because I have no ground to hold your depths. 

I flow like the wind, 

here to just slightly grace the tip of your waves 

before flying and disappearing far away. 

So, I have no safe harbor for you. 

I haven’t enough water to make you bloom. 

I can only promise enough fire and air 

to make the burn sustainable…

beautiful…

destructive.