I Have To Win

I have to win

Over the years

I developed a fear

To mention my insecurities,

Every day I wake up,

Look at myself,

And question my abilities

Am I good enough?

Do I satisfy the standard of beauty to my peers?

Am I qualified to achieve my goals,

Follow my dreams,

And become the star my mother always said I was?

Every day

I push myself to the maximum

Trying to achieve perfection;

Perfection that is defined by others and not by myself.

But, I never thought of what would happen when I got there.

Will I find myself perfect then?

Will I ever find myself perfect the way I am?

I realized that I always depended on what others thought of me.

I had to break free from their opinions

And prosper under my own

I am in control of myself

Not anyone else

I am the only one who can win this battle

Against my thoughts and the way I view myself.

I have no choice.

I have to win.