It's My Own

I’ve felt these pressures one too many times.

Not from one specific person,

but more-so from myself—merely because what I had to offer was not enough.

I yearned for that which I could not give,

a seemingly undeserving love,

a backwards smile,

and a haphazard grin,

that would somehow fix something I broke myself.

I wasted not my time, but my value, worrying about something(s) that would never fill me with the inexorable love I so desire;

and these emotions were only worsened by the ways in which others found fulfillment—

It doesn’t take long to learn that what works for one doesn’t work for all and that one person’s savior doubles as my downfall—

I hurt for those that learn the hard way and grateful that I saw through a lens that was not always mine.

I have yet to reach the end of my years long search, but I remind myself to stay encouraged, for

good things take time...

and the best things don’t arrive on our schedule.